Feeling like you’re going through a “flop era”? Before you blame external circumstances, take a moment to consider if you’re the one getting in your own way. It’s tough to admit, but sometimes the enemy is looking back at you in the mirror. In today’s So Just Be blog, we’re going to look at the warning signs of being in self-destruct mode and offer practical steps to help you reclaim your life.
Warning Signs You’re in Self-Destruct Mode
Neglecting Self-Care
As women, we often put everyone else’s needs before our own, forgetting that self-care isn’t selfish but essential. If you notice you’re displaying a persistent lack of attention to your basic needs, like inadequate sleep, poor nutrition, and lack of exercise, you’re in dangerous territory. Ignoring self-care can also manifest as withdrawing from your friends and family and spending excessive amounts of time alone.
Zero Motivation
When even the most straightforward tasks become burdensome, you’re likely stuck in a rut. Lack of motivation is more than just a feeling of laziness; it can potentially signal that you’re suffering from emotional exhaustion or underlying mental health issues. If you can’t muster the energy to engage in activities that could move you closer to your goals, it’s a glaring warning sign.
Engaging in Harmful Behaviors
The choices we make say a lot about our mental state. Overeating, endlessly scrolling through social media, or sticking around in toxic relationships are all ways you can sabotage your own well-being. Worse, after participating in these behaviours, you might end up chastising yourself, which adds another layer of emotional turmoil.
Initiating Unnecessary Conflict
Ever catch yourself starting petty arguments with your partner, friends, or colleagues? This kind of self-destructive behaviour not only strains your relationships but also chips away at your emotional well-being. You may be seeking drama as a distraction from confronting underlying issues.
Pessimism Overload
It’s okay to have a moment of doubt, but if your default mode becomes a catastrophic way of thinking, that’s a problem. Constantly assuming the worst can happen will not only affect your mental health but also deter you from taking risks that could improve your life.
Practical Steps to Break Free
Address Suppressed Emotions
Many of us are experts at bottling up emotions. It’s important to let these suppressed feelings come to the surface. Whether it’s loss, anger, fear, or sadness, confronting these emotions is the first step towards healing. Try to accept these feelings without judgment and work through them instead of allowing them to trigger destructive behaviors.
Journaling as Therapy
One of the most therapeutic forms of self-expression is journaling. Just a few minutes each day can provide invaluable insights into your emotional patterns. For women who find it challenging to articulate their feelings openly, journaling serves as a private, judgment-free zone to explore your emotional landscape.
Mindfulness and the Present Moment
The concept of mindfulness has become increasingly popular, and for a good reason. It can be incredibly liberating to ground your mind in the present moment. There are various ways to practice mindfulness, from meditation to mindful eating, that can help break the cycle of self-destructive behaviours.
Don’t Hesitate to Seek Professional Help
There’s absolutely no shame in seeking professional guidance. Therapists or counsellors can help you identify the underlying causes of your self-destructive tendencies and offer coping mechanisms. It’s like having an emotional toolkit that you can turn to when you sense a downward spiral.
Being in self-destruct mode is like driving a car with the brakes on; you’re only making it harder for yourself to move forward. But the good news is that you’re in the driver’s seat, and you have the power to change direction. Acknowledging that you’re in this harmful cycle is the first step to breaking free.
For those who need additional help, there are numerous mental health resources available. In the UK, Mind and NHS Every Mind Matters offer valuable information and support. In emergency situations, never hesitate to dial 999. Remember, you’re not alone, and help is always available.
SJB
So Just Be 